‘Twas The Day of Thanksgiving (The Night Before Christmas Parody)

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Note: This was written and published Nov. 24, 2010. I am editing the title so I’m hoping it doesn’t change the date but, who knows.

T’was the day of Thanksgiving and all through the house
the women were prepping and cursing their spouse.
Outside it was cold with lots of snowflakes
the turkey was chillin all ready to bake.
The hubbie’s all lazy sat fat on their ass
doing nothing but drinking beer from a glass.
They were screaming and whining about the tv
til one vile man started a game of fartsy.
The stench of bean dip now filled up the room
when all of a sudden there was a loud boom.
One idiot had said “hey let’s see if this works”
then they picked up a candle like adolescent jerks.
Big Fred bent over in front of the flame
then his pants caught on fire because of his aim.
The men started squealing like wee little pigs
trying to put out the fire by dancing a jig.
“Stop, drop and roll, you absurd little twit”
all of the men dropped til the fire had quit.
The women all standing looking in awe
started laughing hysterically  at them all.
The men didn’t laugh they just got off the floor
walked back to the couch to check on the score.
The women returned to the kitchen to finish
which prompted their laughter to diminish.
Now people I warn you with candles don’t play
cuz nobody wants to be homeless on Thanksgiving day.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.
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2 thoughts on “‘Twas The Day of Thanksgiving (The Night Before Christmas Parody)

Stand upright, speak thy thoughts, declare The truth thou hast, that all may share; Be bold, proclaim it everywhere: They only live who dare. -Voltaire

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