I was taught many things in my life and loyalty was not one of them. I saw absolutely no examples of loyalty until I was a teen and made life-long friends.
Everything I have seen in my life has been, who can I use to get where I am going.
I am not this way, I have no idea where, why or how this happened. But, those who know me well know that I am loyal as the day is long. I support everyone with whatever I can give to them. But, there is a big difference between loyalty and using someone to get ahead. I see far too many people who have no idea what loyalty really means.
Let me give you a definition of loyalty.
Loyal–noun, plural -ties.
1. The state or quality of being loyal; faithfulness to commitments or obligations.
2. Faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc.
3. An example or instance of faithfulness, adherence, or the like: a man with fierce loyalties.
1. The quality of adhering; steady devotion, support, allegiance, or attachment: adherence to a party; rigid adherence to rules.
2. The act or state of adhering; adhesion.
Faithful adherence, steady devotion, support, allegiance, attachment; are all very important keywords.
Nowadays people don’t stay faithful to their spouse or religion let alone to the people they claim to be their friends. I am sure this isn’t a new problem, I am positive it goes back to the dawn of time. But, it has been bugging me more and more lately, as I pursue my dream to be a writer.
I have stood beside many people and helped them reach their goals in any way I am humanly apt to do. For instance, I have moved across the country and in and out of this country to support my husband who has moved us due to lack of work in the years we have been married. I have stayed at home and raised our kids because I support our beliefs that children should be raised by a parent not a babysitter or schools. I have stood by him when he was an alcoholic and helped him to free himself from the demons that showed themselves every time he drank. Through the drug addictions, through the depression, through good times and bad, sickness and health; I stood by him.
Why do you think marriage vows say, “In good times and bad, sickness and health, till death do you part?” That is loyalty, not love, but loyalty. God’s own words telling you that no matter what stay loyal to your partner. Because after all, who else do you have who will be as loyal to you as you are to them?
My loyalty, does not end with my marriage, it extends into my friendships and into all aspects of my life. So why do other people not grasp the concept? Nobody is saying you have to give up yourself for the benefit of others. But, where do your loyalties lie? Everything I see today suggests that the only time someone is loyal is when it is beneficial to them.
People have a tendency to be more loyal to a gas station then to the people in their lives. The biggest mistake being made is thinking that we are all individuals and we are not connected to everyone else in the world. No matter what your beliefs, religious or other; you have to realize that we are not here for self gain. Even the Bible tells you to “Love thy brother”. How can you have love without loyalty?
Consider loyalty like a partnership of sorts. You support someone and they support you, end result is you both get ahead instead of just one. But, people do not have patience anymore they want instant gratification; they want what they want right now. Even if they have to hurt and step on people to get there well that’s ok, because the end result is they are ahead. Only problem with this is the lack of realization that nothing in life is worth having if you don’t have people in your life to share with.
I know what you are going to say, nobody needs anyone to be happy, wrong. Look around you what do you see? You see people, every one of them working towards something and almost every one of them working for someone, i.e. wife, kids, or parents. If we were meant to be alone, why get married and have kids? At the end of the day, right, wrong, or indifferent, everyone is looking for someone to share their lives with.
Loyalty should not just be something you reserve only for your family or spouse. It is something that you should use daily with every single person you meet. In the USA, we say “United we stand, Divided we fall.” Did you think that only applied to war? That applies to life, every single living being.
There are people in this world that do things that you may think do not deserve to have loyalty. I bet, if you looked harder and deeper you would see that even the most horrendous person who has done the most vile things, was wronged in some way that helped to push them into what they do now. It all stems from loyalty, parents who divorce over whatever reason, be it affairs, lack of love or respect, abuse. Every single one of those things is about loyalty. Children abused and neglected, because a parent wasn’t loyal to their child but, to themselves. Now I am not saying that we should all run up and take a serial killer or rapist into our homes and love them to show them the loyalty they never knew. I am saying that somewhere along the way they were treated in a way that made them believe that any human life is indeed expendable.
You have to look at the future, the long haul, you can’t focus on today. Yes, we should live each day with vim and vigor and make the most out of our short lives. But, you must also keep in mind that everything you do affects someone. Even if you think you aren’t affecting anyone but, yourself trust me you are affecting someone else. Think of it this way. When you need someone who do you turn to? Whomever, you just named is loyal to you. Whether, it is a talk on the phone or helping you with whatever need you have. The question is, are you as loyal to that person as they are to you? Every small thing counts, infact I don’t even know why people count things to begin with. Why put a price on something as wonderful as a loyal person?
So, in ending, I say this… Loyalty is the most important thing in this life. Make sure you step up and do the right thing by all the loyal people in your life if you haven’t already. Be a fan of someone else’s life not just your own. Because you never know when that day will come when you will be the one who needs somebody. God forbid you have lost all the loyal people, just because you weren’t loyal to them.